I wake up in a puddle of your
never acknowledged tears.
I hear your desperate calling
reaching out from inside my dreams.
Your screams feel so familiar
a song of sadness that lives in my soul.
It places a weight upon my chest, fighting
mightily against my need for breath.
Slowly I bring my dripping self down
from this sudden impending doom.
Then I look inside for answers
coming up empty and confused.
What prompted this sudden terror?
What is it I should know?
I can sense that this alarm is coming
straight from inside of you.
I feel its unbearable weight.
I sense its unfinished work.
Yet as I try to slow down and listen
your silence is all that I can hear.
What are you needing from me?
What do you wish to say?
Why do you wake me in terror
just to leave me rattled and unglued?
You were left alone and shattered
by those who took from you.
Left to gather scattered pieces
of your stolen innocence.
With no reprieve or guiding hand
in your suffering you constructed
loyal soldiers for your defense.
They shielded you from your torment
offering numbing detachment and rage.
We lean onto these protective guards
years after they were required.
We fear asking them to step aside
might overwhelm our injured system.
Our guards provided safety, shelter
from your indescribable truth.
We learned to wield our broken pieces
into weapons of self defense
lashing out in terror, keeping danger far away.
Yet those same jagged pieces
so difficult to handle
we turn them towards ourselves at times
harming even with our most careful intentions.
Can we try to stand together
without their self protective plan?
Can we sit with one another
and let our collective truth guide the way?
Can’t you see we are together broken
shattered pieces from the same soul?
Our healing can only build from
how each damaged portion is handled.
Together we can work
to safely gather and regroup
those broken pieces when shared between us
won’t hurt the way they once did.
We can gather them together
in their fragmented disarray.
We can learn to lift them out of darkness
washing shame and self blame away.
We can strive to shine healing light through them
make those shattered pieces glow.
A kaleidoscope of healing color
can bring re-birth to our battered soul.
Don’t you see that I am with you?
Can’t you feel that I’m hurting too?
We can’t continue on wounding each other.
Healing only comes when
you see me and I see you.